One time I read in Us Weekly (a long, long time ago) that Gwyneth Paltrow liked British people better than Americans because when she was at parties or social dinners, British people talked about art and literature. But Americans only asked what brand of jeans she was wearing, and who she knew.
So there isn’t one single British person who is highly into celebrity gossip and fashion? There isn’t one single American who would rather talk about art and literature than fashion and gossip? You know what? I think she made a really shitty, sweeping generalization. That fug bitch thinks she’s British because she married Chris Martin but guess what? Americans don’t give a shit about her or Chris Martin. And FYI Gwyneth, you’ve gone down the poop shoot terribly. Your last good movie was Sliding Doors, and thats partly because John Hannah is fabulous. With that said, you need to do something with your nasty ass hair. It’s all scraggly and dirty all the time. Just because you’re famous doesn’t mean it’s okay for you to always look like shit, you know. Also: to make a crude statement about your people (you ARE American, you fug bitch, so don’t forget) is pretty harsh. I hope you lose all your fans, British and American.
Here the little American-hater is, and beneath is a quote about her still hating us.
“I love the English lifestyle, it’s not as capitalistic as America. People don’t talk about work and money, they talk about interesting things at dinner. I like living here because I don’t fit into the bad side of American psychology. The British are much more intelligent and civilized than the Americans.”
More civilized? Jesus, the last time I checked we weren’t running around clubbing eachother
UPDATE: My blog-love Brendon just got back from not posting all weekend. He, too, hates Gwyneth and just wrote a blog about her thinking she’s the shit, too. His is much, much funnier than mine, of course. But still, check it out here.